Happy thoughts and pictures

Well, a few people I follow have posted their top 10 photos, and I thought I would too.  I’ll be honest, I don’t know where they are from, or who took them.  I’ve saved them for myself (I like photos of him to scroll thru on my desktop as I’m writing; I find it inspiring to actually see the emotions I am writing about you see…..<blush>).  I have no intention of posting them anywhere as my work – I assure you I know better with copyright issues and whatnot.  If any of these are your’s please let me know and I’ll give credit.  If you know where they come from please let me know so I can link back or give credit.

At any rate, photos of RA I keep on my phone and desktop to bring my spirits up when they are down……

 

ImageBrooding and dark

 

ImageSorry – virtually same photo, but brooding and light.  What can I say, they make me happy.

 

ImageHis blue eyes are virtually glowing from the wonderful lighting the photographer used.  Hmmm….I seem to see a theme here – full facial shots seem to be the order of the day….

 

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Someone’s personal photo – if it’s your’s or you know whose it is, please let me know, I’ll give full credit.  This photo makes me believe that accidental encounters (like the one I read about on Tumblr recently) can actually happen to us regular folk.  And that is why this one makes me happy.  

 

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Why this photo brings me out of the winter blues I don’t know.  But its a go to for me regardless.  Perhaps its the shadowing, the half image that inspires the knowledge that not all is known, the future is yet unseen.  Or maybe its just the fact I can see him up close…..

 

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And from far away….

 

ImageRA as Thorin, the first of his character I was introduced to.  

 

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And the second.  And so far, my favourite.  Never knew what they meant in romance books by the smouldering look until I saw North and South.

 

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His grin makes me smile – it’s a little crooked, a little wonky, makes me believe his sense of humour is terribly wicked.

 

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And just because they are side by side and I can admire them together.

 

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Lords of the North by Bernard Cromwell, read by Richard Armitage

Not sure how I scored this.  Really.  Guess it was meant to be!  I mean I only heard about it a few weeks ago, but had heard it was virtually impossible to obtain a copy since the distributor was no longer in business and the new distributors (Audible and Random House) have not released this version.

Today I heard RA was doing another Audiobook – Hamlet.  I thought that was cool – after all,  I like the Robin Hood readings.  On a lark, I decided to take a peek on eBay for the elusive version of Bernard Cromwell’s book read by RA.  And there it was.  Right there, waiting.  First listing – reasonable price and free shipping.  So I bought it.  Rather stoked right now.  

Health scares suck

So, I saw my Dr. today.  She’s a very cool lady, a very down to earth, no-nonsense kinda person.  I’ve had these colour changing spots on my chest for about 6 months now, and they were spreading.   So, ’cause it was kinda concerning (after all, spots that change colour and size are something anyone should be concerned about), I looked it up.

Big mistake.  Either I’m dying of skin cancer gone super melanoma and I’ve got months to live, or I’ve got some kinda weird fungal skin infection.  Well, I didn’t like the idea of having a fungal infection of any type, but skin cancer is, shall we say, rather more concerning.  Especially since my dad had skin cancer for most of his life.  I had always been under the impression it had been caused by his being a welder and a farmer by trade, and being exposed to far more radiation than would be healthy (my dad use sunscreen – you jester you!!).  But you never know, do you?  Perhaps it wasn’t the massive doses of UVA and UVB he had been exposed to (and the whatever it is that a welding machine generates), but rather some weird genetic anomaly that I had inherited.

So, off to the doc I go.  Well, not right away – I went after 5 hours of work – or rather fretting at my desk.  Nothing got done today.  I distracted myself with the internet, twitter, my co-workers, and email.  Finally, 2:30 rolls around (the secretary at my doc’s office heard cancer and got me in on an emergency basis – to be fair I did tell her it could be the fungal thing, but she likes me too so I got in super fast), and I sit down, to wait another 1/2 hour as Dr. Z is running behind.  

She comes in, I give her the run down, she takes a look and ….. you guessed it.  I’m a hypochondriac.  I have some weird fungal skin thing.  A plain jane cream from the pharmacy will clear it up in a few days, now be a nice patient and go away.  <sigh>  And here I was, planning what I would do with my last few months and trying to figure out if I’d waste my last few precious “feeling healthy” days with chemo (I decided I would – I’d fight it tooth and nail, and go down clawing and screaming every single moment I had left).  

Well, plan for the worst, hope for the best as they say – I’m not a pessimist, really.  Nor am I an optimist.  I’m a realist.  The glass is both half full and half empty, depending on which way you look at it – and since bad days are optional I choose to focus on what we have, not what we don’t.  And I plan to live for a very very long time.  There are far too many things to do, places to go, things to see and experience in this little corner of the Universe we occupy.